Although we are going to be representing each and every bit of our heritage in this union, we have chosen to follow Abrahams' 500 years old family tradition for the ceremony.
So for all of you wanting to know a little more about what to expect, here are some of the traditions and customs explained.
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The Ahmed-Chowdhury family tradition has span for over 15 generations, going back at least 450 years.
The tradition is from Abrahams’ maternal grandparents side, the Persian Azeri and Patan side. Although with time, these traditions have been blended with the rich Bengali traditions, the fundamental base of a marriage is to take a vow in front of God’s eye and the families.
To explain this simply to our friends and family, we have broken this down into 3 parts.
I. Family tradition
The first part of the ceremony, set at audience level, is the passing of the sword, which is passed down from the male heir of the family. The sword symbolizes protection: the new groom now has the responsibility to protect his bride, his family and hers, as well as the dynasty.
A shawl is then given to the groom by his family to symbolize the protection that he has from his family.
Following the Islamic tradition, a dowry is given to the bride. The families also present the newly married couple with family heirlooms/gifts for them to carry on passing down the generations to come.
II. Blessing the couple
Then, they move on to a stage where the sofreh-yeh-aghd (a special spread) is laid out in front of them. This is echoed in many middle eastern and south east asian cultures.
The following items are placed in the lay-out:
• A copy of the Holy Book This symbolizes God's blessing for the couple.
• Mirror (of fate) two Candelabras (representing the bride and groom and brightness in their future) one on either side of the mirror. Once the bride sits beside the bridegroom she removes her veil and the first thing that the bridegroom sees in the mirror should be the reflection of his wife-to-be.
• A tray of seven multi-colored herbs and spices to guard the couple and their lives together against the evil eye, witchcraft and to drive away evil spirits.
• A specially baked and decorated flatbread "Noon-e Sangak" with blessing "Mobaarak-Baad" written in calligraphy on it. This symbolizes prosperity for the feast and for the couple's life thereafter.
• A basket of decorated eggs and a basket of decorated almonds, walnuts and hazelnuts in the shell to symbolize fertility.
• A basket of pomegranates and/or apples for a joyous future. Pomegranates are considered heavenly fruits and apples symbolize the divine creation of mankind.
• A cup of rose water extracted from special Persian roses "Gol-e Mohammadi" to perfume the air.
• A bowl made out of crystallized sugar "Kaas-e Nabaat/Shaakh-e Nabaat" to sweeten life for the newly wed.
• A bowl of gold coins representing wealth and prosperity.
• A scarf or shawl made out of silk or any other fine fabric to be held over the bride and bridegroom's head throughout the ceremony by various happily married female relatives (mostly bride's close family members).
• Two sugar cones "Kalleh Ghand" made out of hardened sugar to be used during the ceremony. These sugar cones are grinded together above the bride and bridegroom's head (over the scarf held above their heads) throughout the ceremony to shower them in sugar (symbolizing sweetness and happiness).
While all this is laid in front of them, the couple read a poem to each other.
III. Religious vows.
Following this part, the couple make their short Islamic vows (The Nikkah) in front of family and friends, as led by the Imam (religious leader), before signing their contract.
After the ceremonies, a non-alcoholic toast will be given to the newly married couple, followed by a seated dinner and dance... (and maybe a few surprises!)
Make sure you all bring your dancing shoes!
